Writing Course week 5 and 6 - Update

Hi guys

Sorry not been in touch for a while hope your all ok?  Well got pot off foot now but still not great at walking so still off work due to travelling - hope to be back soon - in the meantime I now on week 6 off the Futurelearn online writing course.
Below is a short character piece complete with feedback from other Futurelearn users - some good, some bad.  Have to admit made it up on spot as was behind on week 5!
Anyway hope you like.

Veronica sat with her foot up - stuck in plaster from a broken toe. She smiled as she had managed to paint them a few days ago. Now she was due to go out with her friends. She hadn't seen them for four weeks but was now able to walk with one crutch. She flicked through Now magazine eyeing up the male celebs in trunks. 
Her phone vibrated next to her and she picked it up with her pedicured hands and caught her reflection on the blank television screen. Slim faced, long blonde hair, brown eyes. She smiled, as she could always attract a guy. Hopefully tonight would be no exception, even with her foot in pot and a crutch. She read her text. Two hours to get dressed, a taxi and meet Sarah. She finished her cocktail - now it was party time.

REVIEWS

• Essi's review

  

  Submitted by

  Essi Baxter

  Which method of character creation was being used?

  I think this character is based on a real person. Maybe details of her appearance and (hopefully) the broken toe, are made up.

  Were you able to see the character clearly? Did you want to know more about the character?

  I see a young woman, good looking, single and free, who had to step (!) out of her partying life due to her injury. She is now ready to make up for lost time

  What approaches to portrayal, such as depicting appearance, occupation, voice, and so forth, did the writer successfully use?

  Appearance is well described, we don't know anything about her occupation, or her feelings, or other details of her personality. I think this would be needed if this character is going to be a main player in a story

• CAROLYN's review

  

  Submitted by

  CAROLYN ARTHURS

  Which method of character creation was being used?

  A clear description of Veronica's appearance. I had a sense that she is vain. A 'party girl'.

  Were you able to see the character clearly? Did you want to know more about the character?

  I didn't find her a very interesting character so wasn't particularly engaged with her. She had a superficiality that was not very endearing and I didn't really care much about her life.

  What approaches to portrayal, such as depicting appearance, occupation, voice, and so forth, did the writer successfully use?

  Pretty good descriptively.

• Diana's review

  

  Submitted by

  Diana Bennett

  Which method of character creation was being used?

  I imagine probably based on someone he knows. The biographical method.

  Were you able to see the character clearly? Did you want to know more about the character?

  Yes, I could see her clearly. I felt she was a young fun-loving type who doesn't let anything spoil her fun.

  What approaches to portrayal, such as depicting appearance, occupation, voice, and so forth, did the writer successfully use?

  One could picture Veronica through her description and thoughts. She seemed so young she may even have been a student. Her choice of Now magazine makes her seem a little immature. A good character study. I hope you don't mind my being a little nit-picking Neil, but it should have been manicured hands.